My Blog

         i cried. i cried in school today..in da morning..everyone was puzzled…i myself wasn’t sure either..i think it’s because of stress..and a little jealousy…and a little sad..it’s all because of everything which is going to happen tomorrow..quiz..pesta ria and rps’s sports…i’m gonna miss pesta ria and rps’s sports..it’s not so nice to miss your primary’s sports day..especially if you’ve not been to it since u left primary..i miss my primary days..

     pesta ria..haiz..missing all da haunted house..food..games..duty..and seeing back some of my old buddies frm primary..like tan tan…i really missed her la..she was my best friend..didn’t see her since i left primary..now when there’s a chance to meet her again..it’s been CRUSHED by da quiz…

     i really feel sad..really sad..sad enough to cry in school..so many things..yet so little time..i spent the whole day today in st.john room…couldn’t stand to see other people’s "excited" faces bout da pesta ria….stupid..my parents aren’t exactly helping at all..in fact..they’re not helping at all…they know that i ‘m goin 2 miss pesta ria and primary school sports…yet they jz don’t care..ok..i’m crying again…

        opop..i told him what i felt..but he WASN’T HELPING AT ALL!! what kind of parent is he?! when i said i don’t want 2 go quiz..he jz said: "go find someone else replace you la.." then when i said cannot cz dey registered my name already..he said: " then u go quiz lo.." he’s not helping at all…not at all supportive…it’s jz not RIGHT!! he’s not doing his job as a parent…i’m trying to be open as i can towards them..yet it just fall on deaf ears…

         i really envy those kids which their parents are supportive to them in all ways..some in partial ways..meaning..they do not complain nor care in what their child is doing..if just my parents will just let me do what i want…what i like..and support me in what i love to do…helping me in my problems..through my teen years…but it seems like i have to cope with their discouraging until form 5 with only some support from my friends..friend’s support isn’t enough…they are not closely related to you..you do not depend on them for transportation and money..you need your parents…

        it’s just too terrible…ppl may think i love my parents VERY much and vice versa…but i don’t think so….it’s just love because they are my family..no more than that..i just can’t believe that they can be so discouraging…-words don’t tie yourself down, it ties others- that was what i read from a manga..XXXHolic..and i think it’s true..i’m still sad..haiz..

         i hope that it’ll rain heavily tomorrow from morning till noon…then da pesta ria and rps’s sports will be postponed till the next day..and then..everyone can attend it! niresh say’s i’m evil for saying such things..yes i am..so WHAT?! you do not understand what i am feeling because you’re not me!! stop saying things which will hurt other people because you do not understand what kind of jumbled up feeling that person is going through!!!

         dahlah we enter quiz..no supporters..enter FA n marching comp again no supporters..it’s jz so dissapointing..no one except for some ppl hu are kind enough to spend their time jz to support us..it’s so…uh..bringing my spirit down…i might be getting tired of st john already..getting sick of it..no parent’s support…etc etc etc…

-i hate myself-

-i hate life-

-i hate everyone-

This entry was posted on Friday, April 27th, 2007 at 12:59 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.